S3 E6 - The Nemesis

 At the hockey rink we get to see a true example of how good Michael Vartan is at hockey. We have seen Vaughn skating with Sydney before, but to see him practice shooting the puck at the goal with Weiss as the goalie shows off more of his skill than we have seen before. Although you can clearly see that he is upset, although when Weiss asks about it, it dismisses him. Finally Weiss convinces him to talk, and Vaughn tells him; “It’s been three weeks since I found out Sydney murdered Lazarey. I’ve been lying to my wife for three weeks.” Weiss, in an attempt to calm Vaughn down, tells him that he knows guys that lie to their wives for much longer than that. Vaughn tells Weiss that he says stupid things like that and that is why people don’t talk to him. Weiss then gets serious and tells Vaughn that he was ordered not to say anything, and that it isn’t his choice. This response still doesn’t sit well with Vaughn who tells him; “Yeah, and she was ordered to find out who murdered Lazarey. I mean, that’s my point, is that I’m actively engaged in preventing her from doing her job. She’s going to find out. I mean, you know she is.” Then Weiss says the thing that Vaughn is thinking, that once Lauren finds out, she will also find out that he’s been protecting Sydney. Vaughn tells yeah, now you see where I’m going with this. Weiss then goes for the joke again and tells Vaughn; “Well, this is why people from the CIA should not get married to people from the NSC, man. Don’t poop where you sleep.” Weiss’ remark only seemed to make things worse for Vaughn though because after hearing this, he tells him; “Thanks a lot” very sarcastically and then shoots the puck right at Weiss’s crotch and Weiss goes down.

I think we are starting to see a slight change in dynamics here, both Weiss and Vaughn have known Sydney longer than Lauren. Vaughn is having the obvious struggle between who he loves, which is both women, however Sydney will always come first. But as we’ve seen from the very beginning, Vaughn is the ultimate gentleman, and is old fashioned, especially with the respect that he shows towards women in general, but especially those closest to him. Even though he still loves Sydney and would like to be back with her, he knows that it wouldn’t be fair to Lauren to leave her, especially since he does love her as well, just not to the same extent. In terms of Weiss, we have seen him showing support for Sydney from the moment that she returned, in a lot of ways, Weiss has filled the void that she lost with Will, Francie, and Vaughn. Weiss did say that Lauren is a good person, and that he likes her, but you can see Weiss starting to root for Lauren to be out of the picture, realizing that Vaughn is a better person with Sydney than with Lauren.  

At the end of the briefing for the current assignment, Dixon tells Sydney and Vaughn that they will be going. This will be their first mission together without anyone else to accompany them since they both returned to the CIA. Upon hearing this, they both look towards each other as they realize this. It’s hard to describe the looks that they have, but it isn’t happy, unhappy, or even neutral, it almost seems concerned, but not at the same time, I guess the best way to explain it is that they both look as if they would want to ask each other a thousand questions that they know they can’t ask. But they know that having no buffer this time could be interesting.  

As everyone is leaving the briefing, Dixon tells Lauren and Sydney that he needs a moment of their time. He tells them that he wants Sydney to replace Lauren as Sloane’s handler. Sydney tells Dixon that it isn’t a good idea and that she doesn’t want to do it. Lauren wants to know why she is being replaced. Dixon then tells them that it is because Sydney is more familiar with the players. Sydney still doesn’t want anything to do with it, and tells him, it’s Sark and Sloane, that’s it. And then the bomb drops and Dixon tells her that another player has been added to the mix and that Allison Doren is still alive. Sydney just looks at him confused and wondering how this is possible, we see Lauren and you can tell that she knows the significance of this, and actually looks sympathetic towards Sydney. Finally Sydney asks, if she is really alive.

In an odd turn of events now that Lauren is no longer Sloane’s handler, Lindsay assigns her to go talk to a contact about the Lazarey murder; however he instructs her that she cannot under any circumstances let anyone from the CIA know what she is doing. So she is under orders to not her husband anything. This leads into seeing her at the house that she shares with Vaughn and the two of them getting ready for their respective trips. The conversation is a bit hesitant as you can see both of them trying to not say anything that could include their secrets that they have been ordered to keep form each other. They give each other very little information about their trips. Lauren, feeling guilty about another secret, I assume, tells Vaughn that when they get back they need to go away. He asks if she wants to go to the desert. She just replies with anywhere. The thing I found interesting about this is that we know that Santa Barbara has always been Vaughn’s favorite vacation destination, but it looks as if that is one spot that he will never go to with Lauren. Santa Barbara is reserved for the memory of what would’ve happened on the vacation that they weren’t able to take.

While in the van getting ready for their mission, Vaughn is talking about Marshall’s latest gadget for the mission and as soon as Sydney walks out, he becomes speechless and looks at her as if she is the most beautiful person in the world, which in his mind she is. Sydney sees this look, and has to look away. She really is trying to be good, and not get in the way of his marriage. She may not like it, but she respects it. She goes to sit next to him and they look at their equipment and talk about it a little. She will be wearing an X-ray camera that will transmit the images to Vaughn’s PDA and they will be able to see who has had plastic surgery to identify their target.

While discussing the equipment, Vaughn can tell that something is wrong and asks Sydney if she is okay, Sydney initially tells him that she fine, and then he asks if it is Allison? And as he asks this you can hear the pain in his own voice. He knows that this will be tough on Sydney, but he also knows that Allison was a huge factor in him losing Sydney for the two years, and he has his own painful memories regarding her. Sydney looks at him, and you can see them falling back into place as how they would act with each other before, but that she can trust him, and confide in him again like she used to. She tells him; “Since I learned that she’s alive, I just keep wondering… Does she still look like her? Does she look like Francie? Because if she does, as much as I know I should keep her alive to maybe figure out the last two years of my life, all I’ll want to do is kill her.” Vaughn just looks at her, and we don’t see his expression, but I can imagine that he has similar feelings.

Vaughn never met the real Francie, but he knows that Allison is partly responsible for so much of his own pain over the last two years that he probably feels the same. It is also interesting to note that now that much of their initial awkwardness over their situation has past, and he knows her secrets. They are very open with each other again, at least for the most part. But what I found interesting is that this is the point that they are able to start reading each other again. They know when something is upsetting the other, and for the most part can tell what it is. For instance, he knew right away that she was concerned with seeing Allison again. We will see instances like this start to pop up more and more as they become closer again and Vaughn and Lauren start to have more distance.

Back in the van, Vaughn tells Sydney that the camera is in the stone as he shows her a necklace. She asks him if he minds putting it on her, and he doesn’t. She pulls down her jacket and exposes her neck for the necklace, he places the necklace on her and finishes the clasp, but then we see how much he has yearned to be close to her, after he places the necklace on her, he runs his fingers down her neck and shoulder and can’t take his eyes off of her. He has a moment of utter pain when he realizes that he can’t be doing this and pulls her jacket back up and has to look away. Sydney’s expression as he does this is one of pained excitement, being touched like that by Vaughn is something that she has longed for since returning, but she knows that it is forbidden and as I mentioned before, she respects marriages just in general.

It’s fun to see the comradely that Sydney and Vaughn have while searching out their target with the X-ray necklace; they really have gotten back to a point where they can feel comfortable with each other and laugh. Then to see how well they work together once the mayhem that Allison created began, they can use shorthand with each other and know that if one does one thing, the other automatically knows what to do next. Unfortunately Allison does end up knocking out Sydney after killing the contact. I’m sad that they didn’t put in the scene of Vaughn finding her; I would’ve liked to see that. But I can imagine that with how protective he is over Sydney, he was not happy. I would think that he would’ve taken her in his arms and stayed with her, trying to bring her back to consciousness.

Back at the Rotunda when they returned, Sydney, Weiss, and Vaughn are talking about why Allison didn’t killer when she had the chance. Weiss thinks that possibly after living with Sydney for months and pretending to be her best friend, maybe Allison started to like Sydney. Sydney immediately dismisses this tells him that it was almost as if Allison was ordered not to kill her. Vaughn then chirps in with his own thoughts, and tells them that the question he has isn’t why Allison didn’t kill Sydney, but how did she survive after the fight between Sydney and Allison, and he reminds Sydney that she shot her three times. They go on talking about the next steps of the mission, and then Lauren appears for a moment and then has to go, Vaughn offers to walk her out, and Sydney watches jealously as Vaughn guides Lauren through the Rotunda with his hand on the small of her back.

While on their mission Sydney and Vaughn had to split up to find where Allison went to try and retrieve the device. Sydney gets to her first and we see a repeat of the last fight between Allison and Sydney, luckily Sydney doesn’t get as injured. Sydney does end up shooting her, Vaughn and the tactical unit arrives and Vaughn takes Sydney by the arm and makes sure that she is alright, and spends a few moments looking her up and down, before he moves on to retrieving the device. Sydney calls Dixon and lets him know that while she did shot Allison, she still had a pulse so they had to take her to the hospital.

Personally I would have liked to see this play out differently, but that is just me. But knowing where Vaughn’s motivations usually are, protecting Sydney being a very clear cut one, that he should’ve been closer as the fight was nearing the end. I know the show is about Sydney Bristow and the people around her, and that her finishing this fight was important. But this is the one case where I didn’t want to see a parallel to an old episode. I wanted to see that Vaughn make it to Sydney this time. I know he got there right after the fact, but with seeing a similar scenario to how he lost Sydney initially, I would think that he would be more emotionally tied to making sure that Sydney was okay. He checked on her, yes, but every time I watch this episode I want it to get to that point where Sydney is trapped and Vaughn ends up pulling the trigger on Allison. I guess this is just one episode where I don't think that continuity of character motivations were followed up on as much as I would've liked. But once again just my own opinion and I’m not here to write what I wanted to happen, but what did.

Vaughn is with an officer speaking what sounds like French, and learns that the ambulance didn’t make it to the hospital. Sydney then approaches Vaughn and asks him if he remembers a formula for a medication from the Rambaldi book. He tells her that he doesn’t, and she tells him that they have to go find that ambulance. While driving towards the hospital they find the ambulance tipped over and all the guards and medics are dead and Allison is gone. Vaughn doesn’t understand what is going on, saying that if she had back up, they would’ve been at the hotel. Sydney then tells him that she doesn’t think that Allison used back up. Which only confuses Vaughn, and he asks for clarification. Sydney tells him that she thinks that she did this herself; Vaughn tells her that she barely had a pulse when she left. Sydney tells him that she knows, but she also knows that Allison did it. Vaughn and Sydney share a scared look, and wonder what mysterious stuff is going on now.

• Items that I found noteworthy…
• Lauren’s contact that she went to see about the Lazarey murder tells her that he believes that someone within the Russian government is a mole and is still working for the Covenant, so he would like the Americans to look into this instead.
• This is a clue that the governments aren’t as clean as we would like to believe, that the Covenant may have moles in unlikely places.
• This also is referring to a character that we haven’t met yet, but will appear to be on Sydney’s side right up until the final episode of the season.
• While investing Lazarey’s murder, Lauren believes that she has found the name of the person that murdered Lazarey, a woman called, Julia Thorne.
• The Covenant had instructed Allison not to kill Sydney because they want to retrieve something that she has hidden in her memory.
• Upon hearing this Sydney wants to access her memories before the covenant has a chance to, jack is very against this because the side effects of the memory retrieval could leave her brain dead.
• Before the mission to retrieve a device from Allison, Dixon meets with Sydney alone and lets her know that he wants Allison dead. She killed his wife and her best friend, and now that they know that she has no knowledge that can help Sydney, he has no need to keep her alive.
• This episode has a lot of references to just following orders.
• Vaughn complains to Weiss about having to follow orders about lying to his wife.
• Lauren has to follow orders and not tell Vaughn what she is really doing for Lindsay.
• Allison was just following orders when she killed Francie, but if she follows her orders not to kill Sydney, Sydney will follow orders to kill her.
• Allison tells Sydney that when Sydney recovered Rambaldi’s journals it included a formula for a medication that helped heal her wounds. So even though Sydney almost killed her, she also saved her life.
• So Allison is partially indestructible??? 

Home – As Vaughn Views It

This post is one that I have been really looking forward to doing. As I prepared myself to begin writing it, I tried to research what other people have said on this subject, but I wasn’t able to find much. The closest thing that I did find was in a book of essays about Alias that Kevin Weissman edited called Alias Assumed: Sex, Lies, & SD-6. One of the essays mentions that the reason we don’t see Vaughn’s home or him being alone in his home refers to him not being domestic and that he is only at home with a female presence, they use Lauren with him as an example for this. However I disagree with this line of thinking for two reasons; the first being they didn’t pay close enough attention to the show, we saw Vaughn get ready in his apartment when he finds his fingernails bleeding (Salvation & Counteragent). The second reason is that when he referred to home it almost always referred to Sydney in one way or another. Any other time he referred to where he lived was a house, or the house, or where you live. For Vaughn home isn’t a place, it is a state of mind.

The first time I noticed that Vaughn had an odd sense of home was while he was dreaming after being stabbed, and thought he woke up with Sydney waiting by his side. He asked her where he was and instead of telling him that he was back in LA, as we have seen her answer in the past, she tells him that he is home, and you can see by his face that her saying he was home was all he needed to feel safe. I did think that it was a little odd, but didn’t think more of it until I watched it the second time and me now knowing that it was a dream, thought wait a second, why in his dream is Sydney telling him he’s home. Then I thought that many people refer to home as being a place of safety, so maybe in his dream he thought that he had reached safety.

But the more I thought about it, and continued watching the series, and trust me it has taken me watching the whole series a few times to fully grasp this concept. Vaughn doesn’t think of home as a place, but as a state of mind where he is happy. For most of the series when he refers to home, it does involve Sydney as being that happy place. There are a few exceptions, but for the most part, Sydney is his home, it doesn’t matter where he is, as long as Sydney is there, and they are together he is home.

I thought that to give you the best examples, once again would be to go through the episodes. There aren’t many examples, so they will all be in this post, but it is interesting to see when he begins referring to home as being with Sydney and also when he stops. Now keep in mind that everything here is purely my opinion and what I have inferred while watching this show and getting to know these two characters on a more personal level as I have progressed in this project. I have no idea if this thought process went through the writer’s heads, if it was something that JJ Abrams placed it there, or if Michael Vartan even noticed what was going on. Anyway that we look at this, without being able to actually talk to any of them, would be as a theory.

I did attempt to make a video that captured the spirit of Vaughn’s version of home, unfortunately I don’t have the right software yet, to make the video as I would want it, but I did the best I could with what I had. Because I knew I wanted to get my point across. So here is the video and I will go over the clips in detail better below.

There are only a couple of references to home in Season One;

•  S1 E6 – Reckoning
• Vaughn is telling Sydney about the wall of stars memorializing the fallen agents, he tells her that their names are in a book, and all the families are told are that they won’t be coming home.
• I think that this reference to home actually refers to his father, although most references do refer to Sydney, occasionally they do go back to his childhood when he had his father.

• S1 E7 – Color Blind
• Vaughn tells Sydney that they were worried about her, she makes a comment about how the CIA hates to lose its assets, and then Vaughn corrects himself telling her that he was worried. Soon after when they are getting ready to depart from each other, he does tell her to go home and enjoy Thanksgiving.
• This reference may be one of the only references that I was able to find that didn’t correspond with my theory. But it could refer to her being back from a dangerous situation and that she is now safe. Also he has to refer to her home in some way, even if their definitions of home are not the same.

There may have been other references, but I may not have caught them. But I think that the idea of Sydney being his home came in to place at the beginning of Season Two, when the feelings that they have for each other begin to escalate.

Season Two probably has the most references out of any season, although they are easy to miss references.

• S2 E4 – Dead Drop
• Sydney has managed to get herself into a fairly precarious situation in Russia and calls Vaughn asking for help and since Irina gave her the initial instructions for getting in, Vaughn goes to her to help Sydney get out. Once Sydney is out of the building she lets Vaughn know and he breathes a sigh of relief and then tells her that he will see her at home.
• This reference is the first big one, in the past they have told each other see you back in LA or something similar, but this time he tells her that he will see her at home, and for two people that don’t live together it struck me as something to take note of. He is basically saying that once she is back with him and safe, she will be home. At least as far as he is concerned.

• S2 E5 – The Indicator 
• This is one that I just happened to notice because I was looking to quote something that Sydney had said to Jack and the following scene showed the words to the music in the Closed Captioning.
• Throughout the episode Sydney and Vaughn had been going back and forth with their emotions towards each other, and they had actually fought at one point. But after Sydney meets with her father and she has discovered that her father has betrayed her in two different ways, setting up Irina and subjecting Sydney to Project Christmas when she was a child, she is very upset. Even though the last time Sydney and Vaughn had seen each other, they were fighting; Sydney still goes to him for comfort.
• The original version that aired on TV, and is on the DVD’s features Joni Mitchells’ song River, however the streaming versions have a song that I haven’t been able to identify, but the moment that Vaughn sees her, the song says “I find home.”
• This was a moment for Vaughn that he realized that the two of them may fight, but in the end, they will come back to each other. Maybe he thinks that in some way not only is she his version of home, but that maybe she might feel the same way.

• S2 E6 – Salvation 
• Towards the end of the episode, Sydney and Vaughn are placed in a quarantine of sorts, because they had been exposed to the liquid within the red ball in Taipei. They both know that Vaughn is likely to be sicker than Sydney, due to the amount of time he spent underwater. 
• They both had lied down, I am not sure how much time they spent there, but it would seem as though they had spent the night. The scene opens with Vaughn watching her sleep. They talk a little, and eventually they learn that Sydney is fine, but they will need to run some more tests on Vaughn. The song playing during the entire scene is called; A Place Called Home – By Kim Richey 
• This was the point that I realized that no matter what circumstances they were in, Vaughn was just happy to be with Sydney. Being in that hospital room alone with her, even with the circumstances as they were. He was home, because he had Sydney with him.

• S2 E10 – Abduction
• This time it is an example of what home is not. It is the scene where Will and Sydney are already at a bar, and Vaughn and Alice walk in. As they are going around introducing each other, the song playing in the background is called; Don’t Try This At Home – By Chumbawamba.
• I think the title alone speaks volumes. It is by far the most awkward moment and probably the most hated moment that either of them has had together. Sydney knew that Vaughn was seeing Alice, and Vaughn was aware of this as well. But Vaughn saw Alice as his backup plan to keep him from thinking about Sydney until they could be together. This situation was one that he knew that he couldn’t repeat if he wanted to be with Sydney and be at home with her.

• S2 E16 – Firebomb
• I’m not entirely sure if it counts, but after they were together and they were back at Sydney’s apartment. They are joking about Sydney’s favorite part of the night being the Zamboni, but she then him that coming home with him was her favorite part, and he immediately lit up and kissed her.
• Sydney and Vaughn don’t have the same definition of home, but to see Sydney refer to them being home together just makes him so infectiously happy.

Season Three has the biggest reference but not many after. One thing to note is that when he is talking with Lauren about their house, we never see him call it home, he’ll refer to it as the house.

• S3 E5 Repercussions
• The episode that really brought the meaning of home to reality. Even though what we’re watching wasn’t reality. Vaughn wakes up, or thinks he has woken up from his coma and sees that Sydney is waiting by his side in the hospital. Just seeing her makes him happy. He asks where he is and she simply tells him that he is home. Those words coming out of Sydney’s mouth to Vaughn was like music. He couldn’t imagine a better scenario. It didn’t matter if they were still in Spain or back in LA. But he was with Sydney so he must be home, and that is what he was thinking subconsciously. When he really woke up and found Lauren there instead, it was obvious how disappointed he was when he realized that Sydney was not there.
• This dream has opened up his eyes to what his heart is really telling him. His home is not with Lauren, but with Sydney. He may have told her that he didn’t regret moving on, but after spending some time with her again, it’s obvious that he does regret this decision.

• S3 E7 – Prelude 
• When Vaughn realized that Lauren had reported Sydney, he immediately left Lauren’s side and contacted Sydney. He tells her not to go home, but to meet him instead. 
• Vaughn knows what Sydney sees as home, and that is what the rest of us see. SO he does tell her not to go home, but he is also telling her that her home is no longer safe for her, and that to be safe, she needs to meet with him and he will take care of her.

•  S3 E19 – Hourglass
• This reference is actual a deleted scene from season three and it was supposed to go in the episode Hourglass; I wish that they had included it, it is a great scene for the relationship, but alas they didn’t. I cut the video down in the YouTube video that I made, but I will hopefully find a better version or will be able to make a better version by the time I summarize that episode, and include it there.
• But Vaughn has stopped by Sydney’s house, and it is the only time in season three that we see him in her new apartment. He tells her that he was on his way home, and stopped to see her. They talk of Sloane’s execution, but then Sydney reminds him that he does need to go home, he doesn’t reply, but you can see in his face that as far as he is concerned he is already there.
• This shows that Vaughn thought of the word home and he immediately went to check on Sydney instead of going to his house where he had to pretend he didn’t know that his wife is a traitor. Then when Sydney tells him that he has to go home after they have had a good moment together where he has comforted her, he only looks at her and you can see that he thinks he already is home, and that he actually has to leave home.

Season four and five, really don’t have many references to home, at least not that I am aware of, I tried to go through the episodes that could contain a reference and was only able to find two. But in reality, now that Sydney and he are back together he doesn’t envision home too often, because he is already there.

• S4 E1 – Authorized Personal Only; Part 1
• Weiss comes to get Vaughn in DC and Vaughn explains why he burnt down his house. He tells Weiss; “It wasn’t a happy home.” 
• This tells me that at some point, probably while he thought that Sydney was dead that Lauren could’ve been home for him, but upon learning of how he was used by her, he had to get rid of any evidence that ever showed that as being his home.

• S4 E11 – The Road Home
• This episode title was a disappointment to me honestly, I fully expected that if they placed home in the title, it would refer to Vaughn’s home, but then I remembered that this is just my theory and that maybe all the other stuff was pure coincidence. This episode doesn’t have a single scene in it that has Sydney and Vaughn together. But it does have Vaughn looking into the possibility that his father may still be alive.
• So this validated that The Road Home may be Vaughn hoping to regain some of the happiness that he felt in his childhood with the hope that his father could still be there for him.

• S5 E6 – Solo
• I didn’t expect to find any references to home in an episode where Vaughn is dead. But then I remembered the ending of this episode. Sydney has spent a lot of this episode thinking of how Vaughn would be as a father and also remembering how much support he gave her over the coms on missions. So they ending is so perfect seeing Sydney playing back old transmission records of what was said over the coms. The conversation that we hear isn’t from a mission that we did see, but I have to assume that it was sometime during the fourth season when they didn’t attempt to hide their relationship while on missions. I have placed the dialog from the transmission below.

Michael Vaughn: [the camera is panning around Sydney's bedroom and we see pictures of Vaughn] You okay?

Sydney Bristow: Just having some trouble picking a lock, my fingers are kinda numb.

Michael Vaughn: [laughs] Hey, you're almost home. Just get inside and plant the bug.

Sydney Bristow: Easy for you to say, it's twenty below out here, you're nice and warm.

Michael Vaughn: I'll tell you what, I'll talk to Langley and see if we can send you someplace nice and warm next time. [We now see Sydney in the rocking chair holding a tape recorder next to her belly playing back the audio from a mission where Vaughn was in her ear]

Sydney Bristow: It should have a beach.

Michael Vaughn: Absolutely, I'll find a bad guy who owns a really nice beach resort. And you'll have to go undercover for like a month. [He laughs]  Hey you know what, that sounds pretty dangerous, maybe we both should go.

Sydney Bristow: [laughing] You'd do that for me?

Michael Vaughn: Hey, we're in this together right?

• When Vaughn tells her that she’s almost home, it’s obvious that he doesn’t mean their actual home, but that she is almost down with that part of the mission and that she can return to him, wherever he is watching her from.

Now I know that I probably missed something along the way, but this is what I think of when Vaughn refers to home.I know that this is just my own theory, and that there really isn't anything to this at all, but I like to think that Vaughn isn't just the good looking spy, but someone who makes connections and thinks that somethings, need protecting and shouldn't be taken for granted.  I like to think that the word home is one of those things for Vaughn. For Vaughn, simply living in a house isn’t being home, he can be home wherever he is simply by having the right people there with him.

S3 E5 – Repercussions

Obviously after how the last episode ended, Sydney is seriously concerned with Vaughn, I bet that it is taking every bit of her concentration to not compromise herself and figure out a way to make sure he is safe.  Also as I watched the previously on Alias, I realized one more aspect of Vaughn’s love for Sydney.   Even when it looked like he was facing certain death, he remained silent, I think he was in fear that if he did say anything that Simon and his crew may catch on to how close Vaughn and Sydney really are.  He was willing to die to make sure that Sydney stayed safe.  He was seeing firsthand how dangerous this group she was with really was and he would do absolutely anything, include die himself, to make sure that Sydney stayed safe while with them.  I know that you could argue that he stayed silent for the sake of the mission, and they are trained to be tortured and possibly die not revealing what they know.  But I don’t think that is the case here.  Michael Vaughn will do anything to protect Sydney Bristow.

Now back to the beginning of the episode, Sydney had to wait an entire three hours before she could escape from the team she was undercover with and call her father to activate the tracker. So that Weiss could go find Vaughn.  Sydney is almost in tears as she explains what happened and how she had to stab Vaughn and how she didn’t have a choice.  As the call ends, Jack knows what Sydney’s main concern is even if she is going to go try and make up for not placing the tracker on the weapons, and he tells her that they will find Vaughn. Sydney thanks him and hangs up.  We know that Jack isn’t Vaughn’s biggest fan right now, with how Vaughn has hurt Sydney, but Jack also knows that it would kill Sydney to have to completely lose him, so Jack is now willing to do anything to find Vaughn, if only for the sole purpose of making sure that his daughter will be okay.

Another interesting note is that Sydney did put the tracker on Vaughn and not on the biological weapon.  We don’t see the true effect that this has until later in the episode, but by not placing the tracker on the weapon, and on Vaughn instead, it ended up freeing a very dangerous killer and killed 800 other people, granted most of them were prisoner’s, but some were also guards in the prison.  While Sydney is talking to Jack, he references how the tracker was supposed to go on the weapon, but Sydney essential told him, I don’t care, Vaughn needs to be saved.  Right here we see her true motivations come out.  She also has that instinct to protect Vaughn just as he has over her.  And we have seen numerous times how Sydney has been more than willing to place her life in danger for the good of the world or whatever else needs to be saved.  But when it comes to Vaughn, she has no problem with compromising her ideals to make sure he is safe.  We’ve seen this motivation before, but the most obvious example is from Counteragent, when Sydney becomes willing to work with Sark and agrees to kill Sloane in exchange.  She had often wanted to kill Sloane but her moral compass didn’t allow for that type of behavior until she had the right motivation and saving Vaughn, even if it risked a delay in bringing down SD-6 was worth it.

Luckily Weiss is able to find Vaughn, he is not in good shape, still unconscious and bleeding out, but they are able to get him ready for transport, since the next thing we see is Vaughn in a hospital with all kinds of tubes sticking out of him and Lauren sitting on a chair at the foot of his bed, and we see that a good amount of time is passing as we see her move from that position to various others.  You can see that in this state she really does love Vaughn.  As much as I hate to admit it, knowing why she married him, she does come to truly love him. 

 Sydney then arrives at the hospital and asks how he is, Lauren tells him that he lost a lot of oxygen when the stab wound collapsed his lung and that there might be a possibility of permanent brain damage. (Just as a biology note, from someone who has lung problems, but not as a doctor, she stabbed him pretty low in the stomach, how did his lung collapse?) Hearing this Sydney feels guilty and has to tell her that what is in the briefing, isn’t the whole truth and that she is the one who actually stabbed Michael, but it was either stab him or let him be shot in the head.  Lauren is not happy and Sydney tells her that there is no way that she would ever choose to hurt Michael, but it was the only thing she could do to save his life.  Lauren then tells her that Michael may never wake up.  And before the discussion could continue both Sydney and Lauren’s beepers go off.  I do have to say that hearing Sydney refer to Vaughn as Michael is a little weird for me.  I know that’s his name, but Sydney so rarely calls him that, and I think that in this conversation with Lauren she wanted to try and remain calm, and calling him by what she knows him as wouldn’t help.  So she called him Michael, as Lauren does, to try and make the situation easier for herself.  I think that if she had heard the words Vaughn may never wake up, it would have thrown her into a tailspin, but using the name Michael she can somewhat distance herself from it.

 At the CIA they discuss the ramifications of the Covenant using the bioweapon and the one prisoner that survived.  It turns out that the main reason Sloane was pardoned, was because of the Intel he provided to lock up this prisoner Bomani.  So Dixon sends Sydney and Lauren on a mission together to find out what Sloane knows.  Placing to two of them together while the love of their lives life is in danger may not have been the best decision Dixon. After the briefing, Sydney and Jack discuss Laurens hatred towards her and about Simon Walker.  But it was a nice moment to see Jack reassure her that concerning Vaughn, he tells her that she did the right thing.

As expected the plane ride with only Sydney and Lauren as the passengers, had some interesting outcomes.  Lauren admitted to feeling threatened when Sydney returned, but she hated herself for thinking that because she did sympathize what Sydney must have been going through.  She also admits that she understands that Sydney saw stabbing Vaughn as her only option.  But then she tells Sydney that she wants her to request a transfer out of their office when they return.  Sydney seeing this as a threat asks if it is.  Lauren only responds by saying that she thought it would look better coming from Sydney.  Sydney reminds Lauren that she doesn’t have the authority to do that, and the only people that she knows are in that office.  Lauren then tells her that she doesn’t have the authority, but if she tells the NSC that working with Sydney is not allowing her to do her job to stop the Covenant, they will listen to her.  And right there any feelings of not hating Lauren have gone out the window for Sydney.  Also I guarantee that if the treat was followed through on, Lauren’s husband when he wakes up would have a few words to say on the matter and their separation may have come sooner.

While on their mission to get info from Sloane, as he arrives a man in the lobby pulls out a gun and aims it at Sloane and shoots.  I find the reactions of the two women very interesting, as soon as Lauren sees the gun, she immediately crouches down and ducks by the wall, in contrast we see Sydney pull out her own weapon and start going after them, Sydney even chases after the van that Sloane was forced into by Sark that Bomani was also inside of.  I’m sure that Sydney thinks that all hope is lost after seeing Lauren go so defensive after the gun shots, so she is surprised when Lauren pulls up next to her in the car and tells her to get in.  That and I don’t think that Sydney is ready to have Lauren be trusted in the field to help her.

Once in the car, Sydney is questioning Lauren’s ability and wonders if Lauren has done this before, Lauren tells her that she cross trained at the farm, and then Sydney wonders if Lauren is field rated, she says no, but smiles as she is in pursuit.  Oddly enough Sydney and Lauren have somewhat of a bonding experience as they try to catch up with the van that Sloane is in and try to save him. Lauren even listens to Sydney and realizes that she is good at what she does.  Sydney is semi impressed by Laurens fearlessness when driving, and the moment somehow reminds me of the first time Vaughn was the passenger while Sydney was driving, in S2 E15 – A Free Agent.  Even though things won’t be the same between Lauren and Sydney after the plane and things were never really that great, they do bond to an extent during that car chase.

Back at the CIA, after discussing what happened with Sloane, Sydney is about to go check some contacts and Lauren stops her.  Lauren tells her that it wasn’t her place to tell her to request the transfer, and that even though it is hard to work together she would like to make it work.  Sydney tells her that she appreciates her saying that. 

Knowing the future as I do, it makes me think about motivations of Lauren’s.  especially after the car chase and the look she gave Sydney after telling her that they can make it work out, working together.  I think that after her initial emotional response to Vaughn being in the hospital was replaced with a more rational one.  She remembered what she was sent there to do, she must have realized during her car chase that she wanted to get back to being able to do cool things like that and her position at the NSC/CIA wouldn’t facilitate that and that maybe she should think about calling her other employers to see what was going on, and why she hasn’t heard from them.  Along that same point I think that she knew that if Sydney was gone, Vaughn would not be the same again, which would ruin her current assignment for the other employer.  Just a few random thoughts I had.

Back at the hospital Vaughn is just waking up, he opens his eyes and says Syd? We then see Sydney sitting by his bed. She is so happy to see him awake and doing okay, she moves over to the bed and sits next to him.  The smile on his face, with waking up and seeing Sydney therewith him, looks as though he has just received the best news in the world.  He is just as happy to see her as she is to see him. He asks her; “Where am I?”  Seeing as though the last thing he knew he was being stabbed in Spain, a logical question to ask.  Sydney looks at him and tells him with contentment; “You’re home.”  Vaughn smiles, nods his head, and looks at her as if he is saying, finally.  I will go into further detail later, but since they were just in Spain, it would make more sense for Sydney to tell him that he’s back in LA, and in the past she has referred to the city that they are in.  But she tells him he’s home instead.   He smiles at her and tells her that she stabbed him, and she tells him that she is sorry and that she had no choice and that Simon would have killed him.  He just looks at her and tells her that he knows, and then smiles.   Sydney is starting to breakdown a little and tells him; “You’re okay. I was so afraid I’d lost you.”  Vaughn looks at her tenderly and takes his hand and puts it on her face and tells her; “I’m right here.”  Sydney loves having him touch her like that again and can’t help but turn her head and kiss his hand.  Then when we see Vaughn immediately after he is looking at her exactly the way he used to with those beautiful eyes and smiles as if all if right in the world now.  Sydney goes on to tell him; “Leaving you like that, not knowing if I’d ever see you again, made me realize how much I miss you.”  As she is saying this Vaughn’s hand moves from her face to her shoulder and then arm and is caressing her arm now.  And by the time she finishes she is full on crying.  Vaughn looks at her and is so concerned, the only thing he wants to do is to take away her pain, and then he tells her that he misses her too.  Sydney then looks at him and says; “You do?”   He simply nods at her and then brings her to his level and raise his head a little and they kiss, and it is a real full on kiss.  Then Sydney stabs him in the stomach, gets up from the bed, and asks him; “How could you do this to me?”   Then we see Vaughn asleep and suddenly wakes up again in the hospital room and we realize that it was all a dream.

 Like I said I will go into this more later, I am planning an entire post based off of this scene.  But we now see what Vaughn really has been thinking.  He may have told Sydney that he doesn’t regret moving on with his life, but seeing his dreams, it is clear that he does.  But he also knows that Sydney really does feel betrayed by him, which is why even in his dream Sydney stabs him again, he may even feel that he deserves it to an extent.

As I was saying Vaughn really did wake up this time, and still getting over his dream he’s not excited to see that Lauren is the one there waiting for him to wake up.  He even looks at her like why are you even here.  He really does look confused even as she comes closer and tells him that he is alright.  I find it almost humorous that Lauren’s first question to him is if he remembers her.  I guess after Sydney’s experience I would be afraid of a loss of memory as well.  Vaughn gives her a half smile as he tells her of course he does and they hug.  But as Lauren is hugging him, you can see that he really is disappointed that Sydney wasn’t there.  Vaughn does love Lauren, but this dream of his reminded him how much he really does miss that relationship that he had with Sydney and how desperately he wants it back.  I wonder if he is already regretting his decision of telling Lauren that he does remember her.

After a briefing at the command center Lauren stops Sydney before she leaves for her mission with Marshall, and tells her that Michael’s doctors think he should be able to be released tomorrow and Lauren thinks that Michael would like to see Sydney if she has time.  Sydney tells her that, it is nice of her to offer, but she isn’t sure if she will have time before she goes, so Lauren tells her to come by when she gets back.  Once again, Sydney is a little baffled with Lauren’s behavior. But it is nice to see that Lauren is actually thinking of what Vaughn would like rather than what she selfishly would want.

After Sydney returns from her mission with Marshall, she does go to visit Vaughn in the hospital, but I don’t know if was by her design but she was there along with Weiss and Lauren and Weiss and Vaughn were telling stories.  It looked like it was a casual gathering amongst friends.  Vaughn does take a few glances at Sydney when he can.  But when Weiss needs to go, Sydney asks to get a ride from him.  She awkwardly tells Lauren and Vaughn goodnight and leaves, and Lauren and Vaughn hold hands as she leaves.  On her way out she realizes that she left her jacket in Vaughn’s room, so she goes back to get it.  But as she gets to the room, she looks through the window and sees Vaughn and Lauren kiss and can’t bring herself to enter, but just stands there watching their tender moment and walks away.  I really do feel for Sydney here, it is so heartbreaking. 

This is another scene where the music matches up so nicely.  I have the DVD’s now, but I’ve only watched this episode on Netflix so I can only comment on this version since they switched songs for streaming.  But as Sydney is walking back to the room the song is saying; ”I’m looking so well, I’ve always been the optimist. “ then as she looks through the window and sees Lauren and Vaughn embracing and kissing, the song then goes on to say; “But somehow I’m dumb as hell. So what became of the life we saved up? Record of beauty the struggle between us. Countless the hours between now and then.”   Everything matches up with how Sydney was feeling so perfectly, and again I am reminded of how well Alias shows Parallels in the show in general, but similar situations in the relationships.  This one wasn’t as obvious, but I have already mentioned it once in this post.  During Counteragent Sydney was willing to do whatever was needed to save Vaughn’s life, even after learning that he was back with Alice. Once again Sydney is risking everything to save Vaughn, even though she isn’t the one who gets to be with him.  – By the way is case you are interested the song that I am talking about her is One Last Look by Trent Dabbs.

• Items I found noteworthy…
• This episode has the first Sydney/Vaughn kiss, even if it is in dream form 
• Sydney and Jack plan to draw Simon out so that they can have a face to face with him and ask him more questions about Julia. Jack even has a meeting with Simon to discuss the initial details of the job.  But Javier is hiding and is taking pictures of Jack.  Javier later contacts Sark and asks for his help in identifying this new client of theirs.  Sark tells him that their new client isn’t who he says he is, and that his name is jack Bristow and that he is CIA.  Simon and Jack are meeting again and while the  transfer of money is happening, Javier calls Simon to tell him that he is being set up and that he is with the CIA,  also that his daughter is named Sydney Bristow that goes by the alias of Julia Thorne. Once jack realizes that he has been made he kills Simon. 
•  Sloane has created a position for himself to become a double agent.  He was able to escape from Sark and Bomani by giving them information about a valuable computer software, and now he is telling Sydney and Lauren about it.  He wants to do what Sydney did, work for the bad guys, but really be loyal to the CIA to take the bad guys down.  Sydney is a little baffled to say the least.